Masked Avenger Versus Ultra-Villain and the lair of the Naked Bikini – 2000 – The Masturbating Gunman
Masked Avenger Versus Ultra-Villain in the Lair of the Naked Bikini is a pretty long title. I guess there are other flicks with even longer titles but I don’t think there are too many of them out there. There is also an alternate title that is not only shorter but also more to the point – The Masturbating Gunman. And that’s essentially what the film is about. At least in part. This Masturbating Gunman is actually the hero. At least he becomes one after a while. Because there’s a villain that is actually much worse than him.
There is this german guy who thinks that he’s some kind of Messiah and demands that his men find him a virgin with whom he can conceive a son. It’s unclear why it has to be a virgin but maybe that’s behind the point. I guess the virgin criteria is there because it’s classic really. But there actually might be more to it. Because there are some comments about sexual liberty. That you can’t sell sex the way you used to because now it’s everyday life and no real perversion anymore.
It’s pretty hard to describe the hilarious insanity in this movie. But there are a few things to say that hopefully will tease you enough to see this flick. It’s obviously very low-budget and the acting isn’t very good. But what it lacks in acting it takes back in crazy characters. Obviously, we have this masturbating Gunman. A hitman really. He’s very effective in the killing business but he has one peculiarity. If he sees a woman he needs to stop what he’s doing and masturbate until he cums. And boy, does he cum! He shoots sperm all over the place. And he’s wearing a latex-kind mask all the time.
The main antagonist, the crazy german guy, commands a gang of masked bad guys. All except for one that’s allowed to not wear a mask because he was a close friend of his father. Anyway. They’re looking for this virgin so that the boss can conceive a son. And they finally find one, a nun that happens to be the sister of the masturbating gunman. Oh, and there’s the guy that knows everything about a woman, length, hair color, weight, and whereabouts just by smelling a pair of panties. Hillarious! And there is also an important fact to learn from watching this. I now know how many guns you can actually hide in a vagina!
